not playing dead

August 2015

I feel like I was afraid to switch my sharing mode to ON from time to time, in the last few months. I mean, I didn't want to write (here and on my tumblr, as you could notice) and share anything with the world. There isn't much time either. My world is spinning very fast for a year now. I am living VERY in the moment and in the reality. And I LIKE IT INFINITELY!

I used to think about everything and analyse everything around me. I still do, but this time, it seems like I rather shut up than say it out loud. I don't know why. I don't even write letters as often as I used to. Just now I write a letter to Tadeáš, since we weren't in touch for several months due to his travels.
I wonder if the absence of me on the internet and elsewhere is because I have that one somebody around me most of the time, to whom I can say and show everything immediately?
I noticed he has features of Neal Cassady, my childhood hero. He is just as crazy and just as energetic as I've always dreamt of Neal to be. I feel like he can do anything, get through anything. We moved in together at the beginning of July. I am so lucky to have him in my life. Everything is spinning in just the right speed.

I have a few plans in the future, too, but I am too scared to share them to anyone, in case they don't work out. At least it's more exciting this way. And this way I am 100% certain I am achieving them for me, not just to prove someone wrong. I hope it will all come true. They are not big dreams, one could say, but they mean the world to me.

My brother returned home a few days ago from Iceland. He lived there almost a year.

May 2016

Not many things mentioned above changed, though it has been almost a year. I still live with the Neal Cassady doppelgänger, but we share a different flat with different roommates and with a puppy we adopted. I dropped out from uni after 2 months of attending, but I signed up for illustration & comics courses. And now here I am again, after such a long time of somewhat silence. I realised I have a lot I want to share with you now.

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